This will be my last post on #OccupyFamilyGuy.
I got something wrong in yesterday’s post #AStarForCarrie: Do You Believe In God? I said that no one’s ever handed me a script and said “I’ll pay you to make this better”. I forgot about the guy who hired me through a Craigslist ad to be a script consultant when I moved here back in April. He also mistook me for a sex worker, but not before he paid me almost $2,000 to improve a script for a web series, then started sexually harassing all the women he hired to work on the project.
I got so freaked out by his threatening emails, I texted Dylan Brody asking him to pick me up from a couch-surfing spot and drop me off at my new sublet (which also got me harassed and robbed, DAMN YOU, CRAIGSLIST!… But I’m still here). Dylan said he didn’t have the time or something. I showed him screenshots of the emails, asked him what I should do. His answer was basically “Don’t engage.”
That (almost) $2,000 went to the deposit on this apartment, food, survival, Air BnB’s, and travel between couch surfing spots until I moved in on May 15th. I blocked the harasser’s emails and it stopped. I didn’t need Dylan’s help to get here, but his advice was helpful. I was out of money by the end of May and that’s when #AStarForCarrie was born. I needed the money, but so did a lot of other people. The awesome power of Carrie Fisher’s image was so deeply imprinted on my consciousness, I have not given up on this project even after getting arrested.
Princess Leia deserves the same recognition as her male co-stars. Hollywood needs to start hiring more female writers. Men need to step up and help make this happen. I believed Seth MacFarlane would agree, so I started #OccupyFamilyGuy, hoping someone would start paying attention to these issues. I was in jail for three days. Stay with me folks, “Criminal Dick-Shrinking” is not a thing.
I’m still not totally sure who gave the order to have me arrested, but I refuse to let the Love that led me there turn into Hate. That would make me no better than the guy who shot John Lennon and I won’t let the taint he left on our culture sour the altruistic reasons behind the #AStarForCarrie and #OccupyFamilyGuy petitions. I still love Seth MacFarlane and all his work, but I can’t keep giving his lawyers more reasons to put me back in jail if it’s more cost-effective for their brand. Lawyers could misconstrue all of the Love I’ve given as obsessive hatred and I’ll protect that Love over everything else. I’m not deleting anything and I’ll still show up at court on September 18th if they haven’t dropped the charges by then, but I’m no longer fueling this dumpster fire. #OccupyFamilyGuy is an online petition. Let the internet decide. I have a new script to write.
I forgot about another important element to the story when I made #AStarForCarrie: The Story So Far- Improv Vlog. I wrote a script titled “The Voyage of the Curie” which I hoped Seth MacFarlane would buy as an episode of The Orville. I was so fixated on #AStarForCarrie when I finally had the courage to call Fuzzy Door Productions, that script was shoved in the farthest corner of my mind, it’s like it didn’t exist to me. The Orville is a beautiful, brilliant show and I loved it so much, I posted this video #RenewTheOrville when that was still a question. I wanted to be part of it, so I wrote a script I thought Seth would love, then I started I project I loved SO much more I forgot about it. Is that why I was arrested? Will I ever know or should I just let it go?
It’s not a lie when I forget things. My brain skips over experiences it doesn’t have the power to process at the moment, like a clip cut from a film strip, it just skips to the next part. That’s why I need to write every day, I need to re-confirm my own reality so our gaslighting culture doesn’t manipulate my perception into one of fear. I know I can survive whatever they throw at me as long as I keep writing about it.
Have you ever seen Quills? It’s a film about the Marquis de Sade in an insane asylum at the end of his life. The Marquis (aptly played by Geoffrey Rush) keeps writing erotica from his magnificently appointed cell, which doesn’t sit well with Napoleon. They take away his quills and paper, he writes in wine with a chicken bone on his sheets. They take away his sheets and any other possible writing surface, he writes in his own blood on his clothes. In the end, he’s naked in a dungeon, his writing smeared all over the walls in his own shit. I doubt it will be taken THAT far, but going to jail again wouldn’t stop me from writing. I’m just going to refuse to engage and hope they back off quietly. I’m not the Marquis de Sade and this isn’t Napoleonic France. This is America in 2019 and women have been voting for a century. I’m going to vote with my voice and shut the hell up about #OccupyFamilyGuy.
I was wrong about one more thing. I’m not going to plan a Princess Leia Flash Mob on Labor Day. I started a #SelfieStrike after going to jail not because I’m ashamed of how I look, but because I felt like people were getting distracted by how I look and refusing to buy my ideas. I’m not going to break my own strike on Labor Day and there’s no sensible reason to dress up as Princess Leia and go to Hollywood Square other than to take selfies with tourists for donations.
Rather than make myself a literal target by planning a huge public event that could land me in jail again, I’m going to work on the script for #FortunateSon and keep crowdfunding that sub-project of #AStarForCarrie. I’m not afraid, I’m smart and prioritizing what needs to be done over what some folks would like me to do. Maybe next year, if Carrie Fisher hasn’t gotten a star by then and I can afford to hire my own security guards.
Goodbye, Seth MacFarlane. I still love you, but I have writing to do…